An instant's uncomfortable hush .sx Then someone tittered , and another of them said , " It's possible ; they call it being posthumous .sx " To stifle their sudden shame , they set upon me shouting boisterously .sx " No more questions .sx Steam ahead .sx Turn the Pomeranian pup over .sx A merry dozen !sx " They threw me over Hoghton's knees , and Ludd , the long sallow-necked bully and cad , began his work .sx The first stroke was cruel , equal to Oldham's last , truly , and I cried out in pain and terror .sx " Failed !sx " they all shouted .sx But the strokes went on all the same .sx I sobbed and I shrieked - it hurt savagely , and shame equalled pain - but the strokes went on , and harder .sx When they set me on my feet after Ludd's twelfth and last vicious stroke , I was a broken blubbering heap .sx I fell against one of them , Slade , who said quickly :sx " Leave him alone now .sx " Ely as quickly agreed ( though Ludd was yellow for more) .sx In my misery I was aware enough to see the lie of the land :sx they knew that they had gone a bit far , and that red eyes of a very small new boy on his second day might arouse comments awkward for them :sx for him , Ely .sx Though he was not appeased ; he was coldly furious because for the moment he dared do no more .sx " Snivelling little funk , " he sneered .sx " Dry your eyes sharp .sx Oldham didn't howl .sx " Arrival at Battling put an end to my troubles for the moment .sx Sore and revengeful , I walked through the town with the others .sx Two of them tendered would-be comfort .sx " I'm sorry , " whispered Oldham .sx " You shouldn't have cheeked him .sx But I know they gave it you worse than me .sx " " You've no pluck , " said Slade , " and you're cocky .sx But I promise we shan't kill you .sx " What happened at the school itself that second day , or any other separate day , of that first term , I can't chronologically remember for certain .sx I will go on , therefore , with the story of the daily train journeys , the one consecutive feature of the earliest period .sx Well , their strappings continued , and made me raw ; till sitting in school was uncomfortable , and at night I slept on my stomach .sx Aunt Ida asked Was anything the matter ?sx I said No .sx Not that I thought it was wrong to tell , but for fear of the consequences if I did ; only for fear .sx Standing up in the bath , which was in the kitchen , while Aunt Ida sat sewing , I quickly soaped my thighs and the sorest part , to cover their appearance ; the most telltale marks , Ludd's pinches , were chiefly below the knee and safely under soapy water .sx She wasn't very interested , and my assurances satisfied her .sx My main point is , I didn't tell .sx Any they gave me a daily course of head knuckling and they rolled me on the rack and kicked my under the seat and held me out of the window of the moving train from the knees , and jeered at my names , and at everything I said or did .sx I was the victim and joke , the butt and the drudge of their Crew , to which they would not formally admit me , yet with which they forced me to travel ; their tame punching-ball and pariah .sx One morning when , after summoning up courage for days , I went to the station very early and hid in an empty carriage at the far end of the train , Ely found me ; he spied me out .sx From the platform he ordered me forth :sx " Come along to the Crew at once .sx " " I won't , " I answered , much less afeared of him when he was alone , as he himself never took physical measures .sx " At once , " he repeated in shrill anger .sx " I won't .sx " " Then the Crew will come along to you , " he said frighteningly , and went off , to return in a minute with the lot of them .sx For punishment he let Ludd strike me with the window strap across the face , and though they had scant sympathy with me as being " cocky " and a " funk , " and though now , stung but this extreme outrage , I was braver and shouted while I wept that they were " all bullies and cads , " Slade , Hoghton and one or two others called a halt and held Ludd's hand from a second blow on the face .sx The position , as I guessed it , was this .sx Most of them were beginning to find me simply a nuisance .sx Baiting me had been good fun for a while ; in the long run it was growing wearisome .sx The daily bullying and resultant tears were spoiling the old life of their Crew , whose attraction - I gathered - had been the journeys filled with games and jokes and competitions and conspiracies ; now every day hindered by the unending and unadvancing process of breaking me in .sx Hoghton and Slade would have flung me out at once .sx Ludd and Malim enjoyed the bullying .sx Ely was in a fix .sx Though he was always declaring he didn't want shivering funk and milksop like me for his Crew , he really did want me - on his own terms ; that is , if he could break me .sx He knew by now that my own secret aim was to get flung out - I had soon decided it was better to travel as an outcast , all alone , than to endure the honour of crewship at the expense of daily suffering , physical and moral - and therefore that if I was flung out , I should really be defeating him , not he me .sx I should be getting what I wanted , and he wouldn't .sx We both knew precisely where we stood , and where the other stood , and that the other knew .sx About once a day our eyes met , and spoke mutual volumes .sx The denouement came , not through anything that happened in the train , but through the events of one evening during the Claife boys' preparation hour after school in the physics lab .sx On evenings when for any reason we had no homework , the Claife boys spent the hour and a half between school and the train home in the station waiting-room , a dreary apartment , as are most station waiting-rooms , lit by one flickering gas jet and warmed by a smoky coal fire .sx Boys belonging to other Crews ( of which later ) were of course present also , and this fact worked on the whole to my advantage :sx one or two of these I amused rather than annoyed , and I soon saw that some of them had no love for Ely or respect for his pretensions .sx Still , my pride of knowledge got me into trouble even there .sx They were playing some geography game one night and I was unwisely prominent for my age , size and newness , winning hands down , although the youngest there .sx A much older boy said something about Tasmania .sx " That's not its real name , " I corrected him , " which is Van Diemen's Land , " insufferably proud of this piece of exotic information .sx " Sit on him , " went up in a general shout , " Sit on Van Diemen's Land .sx " About six of them did .sx Most evenings , however , as on the first day Ely had informed me , we worked from half past four to half past five in the physics lab .sx Here again only the Claife boys were together , and all the Claife boys , who formed a sort of school within the school .sx We were about twenty .sx The Battling town boys , who numbered perhaps sixty - I have no accurate idea - of course went straight home after school .sx So did the Westmorland line boys ( about fifteen ) and the Mountain or Pennine or Valley line boys ( about ten or twelve ) , who had convenient home trains without any waiting .sx During this Claife prep hour in the physics lab - specially set apart for us , though with no supervising master - more than half of us wanted to work , so as to reduce the preparation to be done at home after supper .sx But some didn't .sx And some of these sought to distract some of those who did .sx In particular , Malim Major and Ludd sought to disturb me :sx to tease and bully me , as though they hadn't sufficient opportunities for that in the train .sx I usually sat next to Malim , the boy who pestered me the most .sx One evening he was very quiet - suspiciously quiet , I ought to have noticed - while I painfully worked out the sums and problems to be shown up at the next arithmetic lesson .sx Arithmetic was not my strong point , and I always first worked at the sums on a piece of rough paper until they came out .sx On this particular evening , French , not yet a strong point either , was the other homework subject , and I had carefully completed , also in pencil in rough , my translations of the sentences set .sx There were till some minutes to go ; all that remained to do at home that night was to copy out neatly from the scribbled pieces of paper before me .sx I sat back and surveyed these with satisfaction .sx Swiftly a hand came back and down ; Malim's .sx Swiftly snatched them , me sums and my sentences , and laughing in my face , he tore both sheets of paper into shreds , rolled the pieces into a ball and stuffed it into his pocket .sx How could a human being act like that , not in rage , but for sheer spite and wickedness ?sx I could have as little done to another boy as kill him .sx By what inward wickedness ?sx By what right ?sx What had I done to be treated so ?sx What meanness , what a crime , what misery !sx All those sums and sentences to be done all over again , because this monkey-faced about-to-puke-looking wretch was evil , was a boy who dared to do such things , had power to .sx These thoughts overcame me ; gathering up my books , I ran tearfully from the room before they could drag me back .sx I ran on through the corridors and out on to the drillground , now dark .sx It was raining , and I took shelter across the yard in the porch of the Gym .sx Wing , where in the darkness I could squat to sob undisturbed .sx " What is it ?sx " said a kind voice above me .sx It was Mr. Rouvier , a young master , nervous and clever , who taught higher forms chiefly and took us of the bottom class twice a week only , for history .sx I liked his face , best of all the masters' faces ; pince-nez in my mind always added mildness and beauty , and he was gentle even behind them .sx He never struck .sx I thought he liked me , because I was one our form's two stars at history .sx I told him exactly what had happened ; adding , incidentally , to strengthen my case , some details about the train doings .sx My eloquence soon dried my tears .sx That this was " sneaking " I had , in my experience , only the very faintest inkling .sx That it was justified I was certain :sx Malim's trick was a cad's and bully's trick , and I was but telling the truth about a cad and a bully .sx This time fear of the consequences did not hold me back ; my story was out before I had time to reflect on that .sx " What time's your train ?sx " asked Mr. Rouvier .sx " Five to six , sir , " I answered .sx " And the next train after ?sx " " Ten past seven , I think , sir .sx " " Well , Carey , if you can stay till the ten past seven without having trouble with your father and mother about getting home late or causing them anxiety , come up with me to North Room , and I'll see what I can do about it .sx " In a few minutes he had worked out all the problems and translated all the sentences for me ; giving me his sheets of paper to copy from at home .sx " Thank you , sir , " I said at the end .sx " Oh thank you !sx You are so good .sx Why isn't Malim like you ?sx I will do anything for you .sx Why did you bother to help me ?sx I'm a boy and you're a master .sx " " Say not one word about it , Carey ; mind you , not one word .sx I'm not like Malim because - well , perhaps I used to have my Malims .sx I helped you because you're a boy it's worth while helping ; because I chose to .sx "