He had long sensed injustice in the distinctions drawn between ordinary wage-earners and those self-employed .sx By the time his monthly salary arrived , the Inland Revenue had already taken their share , and there were precious few reductions in tax save for wives , children , life-insurances or any of the other normal encumbrances which Cecil had so far avoided .sx He read the film star's sorry story and frowned at the provisions of Schedule D taxation which not only allowed her to claim relief on the most unlikely purchases , but also postponed demanding the tax until her financial year was ended , audited and agreed by the Inspector .sx The process could , and often did take several years .sx At one point the astute Miss Cheesecake had claimed tax relief on the purchase of several mink coats which , it seemed , were necessary to further her career .sx Alternatively , it was reported , she tearfully claimed that the warm coats were heating appliances and therefore susceptible to a depreciation tax allowance as plant and machinery .sx The Commissioners of Inland Revenue wisely refrained from asking how she paid for the mink coats but demanded a receipt instead .sx Between all the interested parties , the final agreement had been delayed long enough for Miss Cheesecake to spend all the money which by rights should have been reserved for her tax .sx Discounting one chinchilla jacket , a Rolls-Royce and a Sussex manor house , all three of which were in her husband's name , she now declared herself bankrupt .sx The train drew into another station and Cecil , with a further six stops to go , was left almost alone in the coach .sx He fumed as he recollected the long correspondence he had had with the Inland Revenue in an effort to obtain tax relief for a jacket used solely in the office .sx 'If the jacket is a condition of your employment,' the Inspector had written , 'it may qualify for relief .sx ' Cecil snorted aloud .sx So long as he did his job satisfactorily , Frask and Kitsell Ltd could hardly have cared less if he wore even a bikini in the office .sx In fact , the previous summer , his girl comptometer operator had done so .sx It led to no end of a muddle with the figures .sx Then there was that long wrangle with the Inland Revenue over travelling expenses .sx The journey from Bank to Norbiton took a large slice out of Cecil's surplus spending power .sx He had tried to obtain tax relief for that too , only to be told that journeys from home to work did not qualify for relief .sx So Cecil had pursued the matter on the grounds that he took his work home and , for a week or more , he took a bundle of record-cards each night in the hope that a passing Inspector might see it .sx The final word , as always , came from the Inland Revenue who fell back once more upon the 'condition of employment' clause .sx Again Cecil glared at Miss Cheesecake who was not only allowed travelling expenses but was also allowed to buy herself a Rolls-Royce 'on the Tax' .sx No wonder she could not pay up ; one half of her money seemed to have gone into purchases designed to defray the tax incurred by the other half which was , in any case , earmarked for normal living expenses such as publicity parties , beauty treatment and frequent foreign holidays to the right places .sx The train drew to a halt .sx Cecil's sole companion , the parcel-laden housewife , staggered to the door and prepared to alight .sx 'Madam !sx ' he called after her .sx 'You've left your briefcase .sx ' His public duty performed , he pointed at the seat opposite without making any effort to hand it to her .sx The housewife turned a baleful eye and gazed at him over a large hat-box which , to judge from the Bond Street label , had taken a large bite out of her husband's taxable income .sx 'It's not mine .sx I wasn't sitting there .sx ' She blinked disdainfully at him and stepped out .sx It was a new briefcase , and as the train jogged along the shiny clasp twinkled invitingly at Cecil .sx He wondered what it contained .sx Probably the remains of someone's lunch or a few secret files .sx He smiled at his own joke .sx Of course , it might be holding wads of five pound notes earned on the black market , if there was still such a thing as a black market .sx It might be a shady cash deal though , specially designed to avoid passing through the books .sx Perhaps the case belonged to one of those fellows who were organising those girls who operated from cars .sx There could be a lot of money in the call-girl racket , and not many expenses either , just a telephone , some wear and tear on the girls and a change of address from time to time .sx The briefcase must be crammed with money .sx Cecil realised that four minutes of solitary running time separated him from the next stop , his home station and , after an unnecessary glance around , he stepped across the car and tried to open the briefcase .sx It was locked .sx Eager fingers felt bulky contents and when he shook the case there was a rustling thud of wads of paper .sx 'Cor !sx ' he muttered aloud , 'there's five thousand at least .sx ' He felt in his jacket pocket and pulled out a key ring .sx In succession he tried his own briefcase key , a suitcase key and a device designed to lock typewriters .sx Cecil searched in his pockets once more and came up with two paper-clips .sx After a few seconds of twisting , he roughly thrust a bent wire loop into the lock and waggled it around vigorously .sx There was a click and the briefcase opened .sx Cecil thrust an eager hand inside , his fingers groping after wads of five pound notes .sx They closed on a single bundle and , fumbling with nervous excitement , he pulled it out .sx His eye rested on a wad of stiff white paper printed on one side .sx 'Old fashioned fivers !sx ' he muttered again , and tried to recall if they were still legal tender .sx Surely the Gov :sx r:. and Comp :sx a:. of the Bank of England would never break their promise to pay on rude demand , let alone on polite request .sx Cecil frowned in disappointment as he focussed upon the printing to find no Gov :sx r:. , no Comp :sx a:. , in fact no five pound notes at all .sx He was holding a paper booklet , the top sheet of which bore , in large Baskerville type , the words METROPOLITAN MONOTECHNIC INSTITUTE ADVANCED ACCOUNTANCY COURSE NO .sx 3 .sx He ruffled the sheets irritably and glowered at his own breach of social morality .sx There are few people who would not jump at an opportunity to rationalise away the theft of a briefcase full of illicit fivers , but to sell one's soul for a handful of lecture notes presented quite a different kettle of metaphysics .sx The train slowed down for Norbiton station and Cecil hastily repacked the briefcase .sx There was a hiss of opening doors and Cecil carried his conscience out upon the platform .sx He climbed the stairs , eager to unload the guilt-symbol upon the ticket-collector and then to emerge carrying his shame unseen , but burning , into the night .sx He reached the barrier and fumbled for his contract before thrusting the briefcase at the ticket-collector with the firm intention of playing the dutiful citizen retrieving lost property .sx Before he could open his mouth , the collector stretched out a hand .sx 'Watch your step there , sir !sx Your briefcase is hanging open .sx You'll have someone shoving their hot little hands inside .sx Here , I'll do it .sx ' The collector pressed the twinkling catch home with a click .sx Cecil , irretrievably laden with both briefcase and conscience , stumbled away into the darkness .sx =2 .sx 'HELLO , CECIL .sx HAD a busy day ?sx ' His mother came into the hall as he opened the front door .sx He nodded irritably and , turning his back to her , contrived to slide the briefcase into hiding between the do-it-yourself cupboard and the polished brass fourteen-pounder shell-case which served respectively as coat cupboard and umbrella stand .sx 'You're later than usual , aren't you ?sx ' His mother tidied her grey hair in the hall-mirror they had once obtained as a free gift in exchange for the labels from half a hundredweight of Trunk and Greppes Tannin-free Tea .sx Cecil shook his head and hung up his raincoat and hat inside the cupboard .sx 'Aren't you going to say hello ?sx ' His mother stood and faced him with a smile .sx 'I've got some lamb chops for you this evening .sx ' 'Hello , mother .sx ' He kissed her cheek perfunctorily .sx 'Lamb chops , indeed .sx Any letters come ?sx ' She grimaced .sx 'Only the electric bill .sx It's up again .sx We'll have to go easy on the immersion heater next quarter .sx ' Cecil gritted his teeth and glowered at the inequity of Miss Cheesecake well-nigh bathing in tax-free champagne whilst he had to go easy on the immersion heater .sx 'What is it , Cecil ?sx Don't you feel well ?sx ' his mother asked solicitously .sx 'You do look tired .sx Go and get yourself a drink .sx ' 'Don't fuss , mother !sx I'm quite well and no more tired than usual , and we finished the gin last week , you know that .sx ' Cecil stepped towards the dining room .sx 'I'm sure you must be tired,' his mother insisted .sx 'You're very irritable , anyway .sx ' 'I'm NOT tired and I'm NOT irritable .sx ' 'Very well then .sx ' His mother nodded with understanding .sx 'You're not tired .sx Nobody's tired .sx Now just you run along upstairs and wash your hands whilst I get dinner ready .sx ' Cecil wriggled irritably under the misplaced management of a mother who had failed to realise that a son who is nearly bald is no longer a baby .sx He started to climb the stairs , stamping with unnecessary vigour upon the treads .sx 'And don't wipe the dirt off on the towel like you did yesterday .sx Your Auntie Edie's coming in for a cup of tea later and you know how she has a good look round everywhere .sx ' There was a tinkle and a thud from beside the coat cupboard .sx Cecil's mother turned around in time to see the briefcase collapse against the brass umbrella stand .sx 'Well now !sx ' She hurried towards it and picked it up .sx 'What have we here ?sx A new briefcase !sx So THAT'S what it's all about .sx ' Cecil halted in mid-step near the top of the stairs and clenched his fists .sx 'So that's what WHAT'S all about ?sx ' he hissed without turning round .sx She pointed to the briefcase .sx 'So that's why you are so irritable .sx You thought that I'd think you'd been extravagant .sx ' 'But I'm NOT irritable !sx ' He rushed down the stairs and , snatching the case , ran back upstairs with it .sx 'And I've NOT been extravagant .sx ' " Naughty !sx ' she called after him .sx 'Mother knows her boy better than he does himself .sx ' She smiled at herself in the mirror and reflected how mothers always know their dear impulsive boys better than anyone- especially better than not so dear , not so impulsive daughters-in-law .sx Her smile faded at the thought of female competition , but brightened again in the belief that her son was not cut out for that sort of nonsense .sx Widowed mothers often expect their only sons to be very lone rangers .sx Dinner was taken as usual before the television .sx Cecil's mother had arranged the receiver to face two armchairs by the fire .sx They sat uncomfortably hunched in mutual inclination , and ate at arm's length from a common occasional table placed opposite their adjacent knees .sx In the days when he had still a liking for cigarettes , Cecil had well-nigh proved the statistical relationship between them and lung cancer in an effort to obtain the table free by smoking his way into a collection of six hundred gift tokens .sx The flush of achievement had long passed and as Cecil sat , eyes on the television screen , not even the napkin tucked into his neck could prevent lamb-chop gravy from carelessly bespattering the table he had risked so much to obtain .sx Mother and son gazed in fascination at the story , unfolding before their eyes , of corn cultivation in Capokoland .sx 'What time's the Olde Tyme Dancing on ?sx ' she asked absently .sx 'My goodness , look at those women planting things , isn't it primitive ?sx ' 'About ten-o'clock , I suppose , the Olde Tyme stuff .sx '